I may have solved the dilemma of attending a destination wedding in an esoteric ( but possibly exotic) venue at 70+. In the rare occasions it’s happened to me, (when I’ve “owed people”), I add up the expenses: air fare, lodging, travel to and from airport, food and such,respectfully decline the invite and send the bride and groom a wedding present check for what I would have spent had I attended.
Young couples seem to like it better and it allows them to party with their young friends without the downer of having a bunch of friends of their parents and grandparents around.